<body> <body>

Where do I begin.
Tuesday, November 1, 2011
12:34 AM

The dark side of my mind-- too many thoughts in my head right now.

Falling out of my dreams, suffering every day.
Hearing the voices of pain, finding the right way.
Feeling the rage deep inside, oh- what should i say?

Time alone will tell me.. who can I count on through thick and thin. I always want somebody, someone like you who gave me life and taught me how to live it. I can understand why you left me.. well, who will want to be with a suffering soul who always lose control of her emotions. I can say I tried to move on but.. I'm happier, happier waiting. #blessme

No one yet has replaced you.. I have to admit there are times I thought I found someone new. But with every step I take, every move I make.. there always come a point, where I say, "U-turn! No one deserve my love more than you!" Yes, I've been hurt by you.. yet I choose to stay because you're the one worth suffering for.

This journey; 1 step forward, 3 steps backward. Sometimes I just get tired but somehow I get that motivation to not give up. Well, it does't matter how slow I go-- so long I don't stop, right? #fighton

At least I feel close to you.. I keep your words deep within. Maybe someday you will see the changes in me? It doesn't matter where I come from.. only matters where I'm going.. you taught me that anything is possible. Oh I believe in miracles but..


[Well, life is unpredictable...]

A few days ago, a friend left for another world.. many were deeply saddened to learn of his death. I teared up a little.. thinking of the happy times we spent playing basketball together.

That's when I began to feel and think a lot.. I thought we have to find time to reconnect with our old friends before it's too late. There are many times when I just kind of want to get together, spend days and nights with loved one.. I believe we will enjoy our time together as well as apart.


[Well, tomorrow may never come...]

I don't want to wait till tomorrow. I want to spend all my time with the people I love in my life. And that includes you! When I think of how much my family means to me, true friends too come to mind. Not a day goes by when I don't think about the important people in my life. They mean the world to me. That's because they're all a part of me. Their happiness means a lot to me. And nothing beats being with people you love.

I wish you know how much you mean to me.. whenever we meet together is when I'm at my happiest. Seeing you smiling and enjoying yourselves makes me happy as well. Every time that happens it's like a picture perfect moment for me. I wish I could freeze that moment for a life time.


[True; we only live once, let's make the best of it...]

In the same week, I got to catch up with two old friends on internet..

One, is my childhood friend who was in the same kindergarten class as me. His brother was in the same kindergarten class as my elder brother. Till today, our mothers are in contact. Sometimes, my mother will talk to me about the brothers.. I would just listen to her. Until that day, I decided to find them on Facebook.

Another, is a friend I know in a 3-days day camp. I'm glad he found me.. it has been years since we last chatted on MSN. We used to talk every night on MSN until -blank- I can't remember when we stopped. Good thing, he remembers me! I like him for he has a positive thinking mindset. Also he could tell that I aren't happy at that moment.


[I'm here waiting to be there...]

Here I am-- to remind everyone, it is important to treasure the people around us. We never know when they will be gone. We cannot waste time when we are aware that life is precious.

A friend also reminds me; we don't need to prove anything to anyone. As long as we stay true to ourselves; be a filial child, be a good sibling and be a sincere friend. Most importantly, we should be kind to everyone, for we are all fighting a hard battle.


[Till here...]

(← previous post) (next post →)


jqMEow |

be happy.
love life.

09 July 1990

Typical ♋ian;
I'm a suffering soul and sometimes lose control of my emotions. I need you to be understanding and not give up on me.

I don't want to own anything until I know I've found the place where me and things belong together.

✉ tan.jiaqi@live.com

Nuffnang |

Connections |

DAYSilove |

Facial Expressions ◭
Let's do it every year!
Awe Night at Marina Barrage
It all begins with a smile...

VIDEOSilove |

01 02 03 04

Yesterdays |