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Wednesday, March 17, 2010
1:51 AM

Today, now, I am gonna tell you a little (not so secretive) secret of mine...


There are three 'friends' I want to 'be friend' with... or maybe four? No... five! Not right... four. Ok, three.

And they are none other than... him, him & him! Hehehe, :>
(whoever him, him & him are is not the point here)

So why them...? It is not because they are oh-so-handsome, or oh-so-wealthy... blah blah blah. But there is something special about them, that makes me feel they will make a good friend. And if I have a chance to choose, it will be THEM! Yes, them!

Let me share about...

Mr Cheers; I met him during the stressful period in my 'ugly' usual look, during my 'rare' trip to the market with the mother. He is extremely friendly towards us. He jokes with us, and it always make me leave the shop with a smile. I was glad the mother is well known in the market, and the brothers are popular in the neighbourhood. Back when Studio Project tensed me up, I will get out of the house to refresh my mood. Then the mother and I will pass the shop he is working in, if not we will pop in to purchase milk or ice cream. Sometimes I volunteer to buy the newspaper, just to see him! Because I know I will be back home in a cheerful mood. But when I don't see him, it will be disappointing. It will feel like a waste trip. Anyhow, I thought I see him on my way back to Singapore from Johor Bahru, just now... I was so excited, and it gave me the courage to pop into his shop to ask him if he is from Malaysia. But dang, it is not him. Oh, he actually thought I am the youngest in the family. Haha... and I actually told my mother he is good looking. Most surprisingly, she said she won't mind me being with him, after I told her about me wanting to be friend with him. Cute. But the brothers who are friends with him said he is a playboy ley. I don't mind. No, I meant... I want to be friend with him only. Purely friendship. But when the word 'playboy' came out from my brother's mouth, it pinched my heart a bit. Just that little bit... Still, I am happy. Because he is the only one, of the three, whom I can see often... ... until we move house. Sad face.

Happy boy; We never talk, until my last birthday. It was a big surprise to receive a message from him. Somehow, I want to know him more than I wanted to, after knowing him. But I guess I will never get to, until he bothers to send me a message again. I 'follow' him closely, to understand him more. But not anymore. Maybe a friend is right, to say he is not the person for me. But I am sure, he will make a good friend. A happy boy; the impression I have of him. Even though I know the inner him may not be as happy as I thought so. But I will not deny, he has the ability to brighten my day. Not just mine, I guess. His smile... keeps me smiling. And yes, I am still hoping... looking forward to the day he ask me out again...

Not to forget him, favourite boy; I will never forget him! & I want to be his friend, 'all over'. I hope I will not fall for him again, hehe. I believe it will feel good to sit beside him, trying to understand what he share with me. It will be best, if I dare to speak out and ask him what happened. & I'm very sure, I will feel relieve... forget about us. If I do ask, remind me to ask what had he 'wrote' on my back those nights... maybe some sweet words? Haha. Oh well, I am not gonna go on listing down how oh so good to be with him... it will bore you to death. He is good. Definitely a good friend. Period.


Everyone of you should have someone you really wish to be friend with... ? But not many of us will step out to say, I-want-to-be-your-friend! I do not have the courage to tell them, but I always believe in whats planned for us. & maybe miracles do exist, so nothing is impossible. Again, someday we will know...

Goodnight peepz.

P.S I am happy I met them.

jqMEow |

be happy.
love life.

09 July 1990

Typical ♋ian;
I'm a suffering soul and sometimes lose control of my emotions. I need you to be understanding and not give up on me.

I don't want to own anything until I know I've found the place where me and things belong together.

✉ tan.jiaqi@live.com

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